An ad for a health club caught my attention when I was reading a newspaper. There was a beautiful picture of an attractive lady who was well dressed and who was pregnant. She has been married for 12 year and has 2 kids on the way. She has her own business; she takes care of the family and also makes time for herself by dropping her kiddies in the health club room.
In the same paper and another article was also there about a female pediatric orthopedic surgeon. The first thing mentioned in the paper was that she thinks life is beautiful and enthusiastic. She was a star athlete in high school and still participates in triathlons. She got married to her high school sweet heart, and they have two children. In the article she tells that she came from a hard working family and her mother even though she was working as a surgeon had plenty of time to spare with their children. It was also mentioned that in spit of her busy schedule, she finds plenty of time for her children and husband they routinely go skiing and mountain biking together.
When I read both about the health club and article about the surgeon I have evoked in me a mixture of envy, insecurity, and guilt. The reason being as a professional woman with a law degree, a good job, stable marriage and a beautiful daughter the life was miserable most of the time. How can other women able to be juggle even though they are working and why don’t I find time for my family.
Then after having a second child I realized that all the women are same. An ordinary woman like me feels difficult to cope up with work and managing the family. The feeling would be the same for the hair colorist to the medical doctors. I came across articles in which women leave their jobs just to raise their children, and the use of nannies and the struggles by one or more female characters.
There are lots of changes in the women’s life and she wants to adjust herself according to the situation. I heard a student addressing a nationally syndicated program that once she gets married she would leave her profession and take care of her children and family. This is because her mother was working and she was raised in child care, and she doesn’t want her children to go through all the difficulties which she had.
Most of the women after getting married prefer to be at home and take care of their children. This has increased in 2000 census and there has been an increase of 13% in the last decade. The motors aged 25 to45 stay at home workless, professional women, between a quarter and third are out of the work force.
I’m not trying to make women who work outside the home guilty or ashamed for their choices either. I am aware of the reality, why should a women paint themselves into a corner. You should feel equally important as your husband without having to live in their world. Don’t let anyone make you feel anything less than proud of having the courage to live the life you need.
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